Self Sabotaged Success

You just a gave a presentation, your audience was thrilled and felt inspired. However, you forgot one of the minor points you wanted to make but it didn’t ruin the main point.

What are your first thoughts? Are you focused on your inspired audience or the minor point you have forgotten?

If you are like the majority of the population your only focus is on your mistake. You start beating yourself up.  Your thoughts become negative, the voice in your head starts speaking, “you are worthless,” “you always mess it up,” or “you will never be good enough.” These little negative thoughts wreak havoc on your self-confidence and self-value.

Or, you have been working diligently toward a goal but you seem stuck. All your efforts seem to be for nothing because every step forward pushes you two steps back. Even though you have made exceptional progress considering where you were in the past. Again, the little voice starts back up with the same negative thoughts.

How do you stop this self-sabotaging?

Here are two tips to help you stop undermining your success and overcome the voice in your head.

1. Celebrate the small wins

What went well? If you gave a speech or finished a project, there will always be room for improvement. But what did you do with success? Or, if you feel stuck, what have you accomplished in the last week or two? Celebrating the little things will allow you to keep a positive focus as you evaluate your project or your progress. If you always focus on what is going wrong you will start to believe nothing is going right. As you focus on what is going right we can keep our self confidence and self value up but you can also continue to build upon it.

2. Set your goals and keep them set

As you start striving toward your goals you might have the tendency to move or add on to the goal. The closer you get to your goals you start to think, “it’s not enough.” The voice in your head says you should be achieving higher goals. This starts the vicious cycle of negativity. As you add on to your goals you allow yourself to only see the goal(s) which you haven’t achieved yet. If you allow yourself to complete the original goal you can continue to build your confidence. This will also give you an opportunity to become more successful because as you reach one goal you can set the next one!

As you move forward in your quest to better yourself you must keep your focus on the positive things you have done so far, which will allow you to endure to the end.


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Stephen Mattson

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